Sometimes I just feel that words bubbling up. Needing to try and escape this cage. Sometimes it’s hard to find words for what I’m feeling and going through. But I have to try because I need to break the Silence.
There’s so much they don’t tell you about postpartum. I wish people prepared for postpartum like they do packing for the hospital.
Why aren’t we taught about how to prepare for a mental health after having a baby? Why are we not given the resources to make sure we have the right medical team to help us through if needed? Why are we educated about how important it is to have support after having a a baby? Our medical system is setting us up to fail.
Our culture has developed in a way that doesn’t help our moms and baby’s. It use to be that you had your mom and grandmother right there to help you. Postpartum use to be considered a sacred time that must be protected and supported. The saying “it takes a village to raise a child” came from it use to be a village of woman who helped you raise your children. We’ve moved to an isolated state of living which only makes mothers feel more isolated in such a delicate time.
I think social media is a double edge sword. It gives you the illusion that you’re not alone but really you don’t have any real face to face relationships that woman yearn for. It’s how we are programmed. Then you only see what people want you to see of their life. The days they are all put together and look like they can manage the world. The dates with smiles that don’t show the fight the couple had the night before that ended in a cold night. The smiles of the kids at the park but it doesn’t show the 3 hour tantrum she just had to survive.
It creates comparison in the worse form and further the struggle of depression and self worth. It’s SO important we have those real face to face relationships to help us through motherhood. Let’s not sugar coat it, motherhood is hard!
Reach out, create regular get togethers. Create a support system that you know you can count on at a drop of a pin if you need help. Don’t be afraid to ask for help, we weren’t meant to do it alone. Trust me I learnt that lesson the hard way.
Mama you’re doing better than you think, believe me. I know the mom guilt can seem overwhelming at times but don’t let that win. You are super woman, but even super woman need a sidekick. Create those relationships. They will change everything for you. I know they have for me.