“There’s no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one.”
– Jill Churchill
Mothers Day. It’s a day of reflection for me. It wasn’t always that way. Traumatic experiences seem to change us as a person. For worse, or the better.
As I reflected this year I just was surprised at how far I’ve come as a mother. Through every child I’ve been molded, I’m sure mothers everywhere can relate to that one.
I didn’t get swarmed with presents, I got some super cute little homemade gifts from the kids- Thanks Grandma! You see my gift this year and for about the next thousand years is the very expensive fusion I will be flying to Spain for here soon. I didn’t need presents though. Their gift to me has been how brave they’ve been in supporting me to get healthy again. Through being strong selling the house, and seeing on the calendar how many weeks I’ll be away during surgery/ and beginning of recovery. Their tiny spirits are mighty and strong. I’m so proud of them. I feel their love in so many other ways other than gifts.
I’m leaving soon. My surgery has been rescheduled, thank you Jesus!. I’m a bit emotional when thinking about leaving my tiny monsters that long. They are crazy and drive me insane but I love them and will miss them a lot. I think the last few weeks there will be difficult.
I’m trying to be very conscious of the time spent with my children right now. Push through the pain more than normal to play one on one, and get the deck of uno cards out. I’m taking extra deep breaths at bedtime to be patient and take a little extra time tucking each of them in.
Finally, I’m having to really give control over to God as I leave my kids for 6 weeks! SIX! Do you know how much they will have grown in that time? How much older they will look? I am dreading saying goodbye to them and the tears that will come, and looking forward already to hugging them upon my return.